Mini posts

I haven’t blogged for ages so here are a few of the mini blogs that didn’t quite get finished due to huge lack of time.

Showers and baptism:

If Jesus had had a shower to his disposal would be have baptised people using that as it is a more effective way of washing, if you use than thinking that being dunked is like a bath. As well as this is know that a baptism is a public display of your commitment, but public is any number over two people… would it be deemed acceptable to do it in front of say three close friends/family members?


Books and Glasses:

It has got to the sad state lately that I find it hard to read a book without my glasses yes that does mean I have ‘readers’…but I have been reading a book I have had on my book shelf for ages. “What every volunteer youth worker should know” by Danny Brierley. I have quite enjoyed reading it. It has had some thought provoking points made not that I can find it at this precise minute (my pencil marks have failed me) but there is a point in the book that says it’s a youth leaders role to encourage the young people to challenge the status quo of the church, to encourage them to question and change things as it points our they are the next generation and without this change church would have never have changed.

Sociology and religion:

After a lot of change my sociology coursework became about young men and women’s views on religion. Having started this study I have decided I don’t like it. Its very interesting but its making me look at the darker side of religion especially Christianity, as much as I am the first to pick holes in something some people are worse than me. I have been made to pick out the oppression of women in the bibles turns out that I have been reading it with a very closed minded approach, I think in future I will think twice before picking a subject I enjoy too much…

The last, the least and the lost.

The last, the least and the lost.

I'm not sure i like this phrase very much but i do like the thinking behind it. It's something that is on my heart a little bit. For some reason i enjoy working with the people that are hard work, (don't hold me to that) the ones that need the extra help. Back to the point its a short but simple one that brings up more questions than it does answers.

Being a Christian youth worker are your really doing this? (working with the last, the least and the lost?) my thinking behind this is because you are always or 90% of the time working with the found? or are they lost in another respect? let me know what you think it really does interest me!

Is bullying a vital part of a child's development?

Is bullying a vital part of a child's development?

I was in the car the other day talking to Dave about children and the major milestones in their life's. The point was brought up that most children are bullied. Does this key point in their life actually mold the person that they become? Thinking about this in a bit more detail i was thinking about how these children reach. The small outcome i came to was two incredibly stereotypical ideas that when a child is bullied they either retreat into them selves and become a very shy keeping their head down at all costs doing anything not to draw attention to them selves. Or they become loud and and outspoken challenging what is happening to them sanding up for themselves (if they are getting anywhere or not).
Is this the key point in your life when you either come out of your shell or hide. For the children that stand up for them selfs is this when they gain self confidants and start to find them selves? What it made me think about is the children who don't ever get that one boost of confidence it takes to stand up for them selves, the children and young people that need that little bit of extra help, what happens to them? do these children become down trodden young people and adults with low self esteem and lack self worth? i just found it quite interesting. How does being bullied effect a child's mental and social development? or does it not, it is always said that being bullied 'scares you for life' I'm sure you can remember being bullied and if you weren't you were lucky, you probably had another pivotal point in your life...
I'm finding this really hard to put into words and it may not make much sense if it doesn't I'm sorry I'm not gifted in putting my thoughts into words!

Grapevine....

Since the last post alot has happened, Dave and i went to Grapevine which was amazing i just love seeing God move and work in such unthinkable ways it just completely stops me in my tracks. This year it was eventful for me but unfortunately not so much in the same way, i had an evil cold for some nasty reasons that i am NOT talking about ever again i was quite violently sick and i spranned my wrist 'catching' someone (i still can't catch may it be person or ball i just cant do it)and the funniest bit of all was me loosing my voice, but despite this i had a great time and again have come back looking forward to next year(if not for the meetings and the kids but to find granny again(see picture) teehee). i also haven't come back with any crazy plans this year which i'm sure Jon will be relieved at.
Then we went up to see Pete and Ali for a few days which was great, sometimes it's just nice spending time with someone without the need to be somewhere or do something, we could all just enjoy being with each other. I would love to go on holiday with a load of friends where there is no TV no internet and we have to get back to our old skool roots and talk and play stupid little games.
Talking of games we had a great Chinese buffet in which a genius game was born, eating jelly with chopsticks! immense!
Well here starts the beginning of the rest of the next few months, i have the children and youth leaders meeting tomorrow and work then coursework and finding a gap year and uni, then back to college so sorry if i am a bit tired when i next see you.

General update

This week one of the English teacher that Dave works with walked out on her class because of the short notice i was asked to step in. teaching 12 French students English isn't as bad as it sounds. As well as that this week i got my AS results i got D,C,C which I'm quite happy about i just have another year to go now. oh and finally i think i have found a university i like the look of, Newport in Wales.
My plans for this coming week are finish teaching then head up to Grapevine and then Pete and Ali's which should be good.

Life for a few weeks...

I haven't blogged in a while so this is generally a catch up firstly sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors in the last post it was written on my phone and at this time probably didn't care.
My life lately has seemed really busy but not much has happened. I am now free of college for 6 weeks woo! Apart from results day on the 16th. My driving lessons are going well but yet cant ever see myself driving there are so many things to remember all at once especially on roundabouts! but never mind i will get there one day. Things at Sainsbury's are pretty rubbish i really don't know why i am still working there, the rubbish i have to put up with is stupid. i think i just clash with the way in which the company works or well the management. i don't know but i don't like being blamed for things i haven't done or just generally being sworn at... somethings don't change i suppose.
What else has happened... well i have been trying to sort out some ideas for my gap year, this has been more hassle than its worth, i know what i want to do i just don't know where or how i want to do it, some of the things that i have seen are more about training is it wrong of me to just want to be thrown in at the deep end. i am aware this is quite (well very) demanding of me, but i know what i want to do its just a matter of finding somewhere that will suit me, and thats the difficult bit.
Oh i have remembered something else, the joys of sitting and reflecting on life. While Dave was having his interview at the church the other day i send a while just walking down the beach, i know its not the most direct route to the rustiest of all villages but it made a change, so i took the time just to reflect i ended up sending about 45 mins just sitting on a rock, listening to music watching spending time just thinking, but it was amazing i strongly recommend just taking maybe an hour out of a week just to sit, with nothing around you just to think pray and reflect i was great.
Well that's quite a long rant but thats it... and hopefully it wont take me as long to post next time.

Years months days hours seconds...

Today it has been2years since me and dave told everyone we were together.i was thinking about it and its all quite crazy.a 2years is a very long time and b how great it is in general that two people so different can get on so well and understand the other person to such an extent an exchange of looks can tell you whats on their mind. I dont know i just think its really cool that we are both as happy as ever and can continue to have as much fun as we did have! :)

catch up

Last night i woke up at about 2.30 and made a random connection, if you call your friends and family your rock does that mean that in the song Almighty God by Tim Hughes, it says "if we did not praise the rocks would cry out" could this technically mean if we don't give our lives to God our Christian friends (our rocks) would cry out? Random thought ay? lol.

On other stuff life is a bit busy at the moment it's coursework time of year which i always bad, and i have to write my personal statement which is equally just as bad, its really difficult to big your self up to the extent the teachers want you too there is only so much talking out your bum you can do. I'm going to book my first driving lesson when BSM ring me back. And finally i have to create a film for B and E week at college that is going to be funny! teehee!

Egg Box Post

A while a go i wrote all over a small chocolate egg box, these words were of encouragement and love (mainly love). This is one of my random pieces of "art" work.
This box when i gave Dave it was bright purple. Over time the box has faded and changed into a pale plain gray box, but once opening it it revealed that bright colour it once was. Me and Dave started talking about the significance of this box after talking about it for i while i went home. It got me thinking, does love really ever fade? When it appears dark, faded and washed out on the outside is it still on fire somewhere deep inside. I don't think that love ever does fade (this may make me naive?maybe) i believe there is always that spark no matter how long it has been since it was seen. I just may be hidden beneath a layer of issues, but i think every relationship that has truly experienced love there is always something to work at.
And there i started to think about the interference of the sun, the interference of any other person or people in the relationship. If that box had been left out of the sun it may have not faded or certainly not as quickly, is this why relationships fade so quickly especially the ones in the public eye ? The box is never opened... they never rediscover why they fell in love in the first place...

Birthday Surprise

Yesterday, Dave took me to london for the day with me not quite knowing what was going to happen. We jumped on the train (and quite a few hot, smelly tubes) and had a magnificent day.

We started by going to Tate modern where my phrase for the day was "Grow some culture man!" I was a bit disappointed that there was no big slide. From there Dave took me to a lovely restaurant where we had dinner overlooking the Thames, we then re-crossed the Millennium bridge (but I couldn't make it sway, no one told me that they fixed it :-( ). Then we went and had look at St. Paul's and promptly jumped back on a hot train (yuck! I hate the tube) and went to my surprise destination

//cue music that build suspense//

We walked down Dury Lane (but couldn't find the muffin man, or even a muffin - that's my childhood dreams shattered), ohohoh... I managed to majorly embarrass Dave by singing "Have you seen the muffin man." Rock and Roll! We had a look round Covent Garden, all the little boutiques, and then finally too my surprise....

//cue drum roll//

THE BLUEMAN GROUP

Ahhh, it was so amazing, I really really really recommend it. We sat in the first four rows with amazing views of the Blue men. I think one of the best bits was at the end when they pulled our huge amounts of (recycled) loo roll over our heads, and I got scared by a Blue man grrr...we jumped on a few trains home, only to find Stuart Bellamy at Victoria station (who was "going to the pub" teehee). We even managed to grab some chips and got to Slam before it started.

One intense, but hugely amazing, day!

PS. This post has been guest edited by Dave, because Rosie doesn't like his keyboard!

Conversations and Views

Last night at work i was having a conversation with someoneand somehow we got from talking about Nijas to relationships and in this sex in relationships i dont quite know how it happened but it made me realise how it must be being in an 'active' relationship and the insecurities that come along with it.while we were talking about this he asked about me and Dave his reaction was "why is he with you if he is not getting any?what does he see in you?" nice ay ? after we talked about this he was saying he has never been in a relationship where he KNEW she was with him for him. i just thought this was really sad. society has changed so much that i have become the one being looked upon as sad not him, i think there is something wrong there.

PEZ

i am outraged i got some PEZ and its nothing like i remember it doesn't even shoot them out anymore.:( what is this world coming to?
i got my provisional woo the streets are no longer safe well as of the 23rd of June :P im excited !!!!broom broom!
finally monkey update i finally had my monkey wars and there isn't anything more i could ask for in a monkey:)

Oh and Ben i emailed the other Mars Hill, thank you! i'm just waiting a reply!

My one o'clock post

Last night i couldn't sleep(whats new)so decided to write a blog post in the dark at one this morning...(it sound and can be taken in quite a depressing way but is not meant to be)
Recently i have realised that nothing in my life is permanent, after finishing my A levels i don't HAVE to do anything, nothing is set in stone i can do almost anything i want to(depending on my braces may mean i cant travel)
With this in mind i have been thinking a lot about where I'm going to take my life and where it will lead me. it came as a revaluation to me at about half one that there is no point worrying and thinking about it give it to God he will deal with, open doors, close others and give me true direction to my life the way HE planned it not my way.
As i was thinking and praying about it i got that awful feeling you get when you know something you have been trying to ignore has come back. for ages now i have had that horrible feeling i am being poked into something. The church... i don't know what in the church but a church somewhere... which i think is quite ironic considering my views on the church and womens roles in the church.ha !
but the reason i am publishing it is to ask you to pray about it for me, and in the words of Dave "pray where your spirit guides you". this is quite a scary thing for me I'm giving the rest off my life to what i feels is right no plans no nothing. so please pray and let me know...(just in case 'm really ignoring what is really trying to be said) Thank you

Email to Mars Hill

A few months ago i had a very vivid dream about a gap year, in a church called Mars something, i had this dream again a few nights ago, so i decided to email Mars Hill, the worse they could do was confirm the details in my dream. At the time of having the dreams i thought it was a bit strange as i don't generally remember them, but this dream was really vivid like i said i was at a church called Mars something and was greeted by a women called Karen, this woman had long blond wavy hair, who started talking to me on a red sofa.. its strange what you remember. But i got an email saying that they don't run gap year internships and didn't know of a women called Karen. Which put an end to that one...

Driving and my monkey

OK lets tall about the most important bit first my monkey i got an email today to say he has just been sent so the long wait is almost over.


Secondly driving... well in about a month i will legally be able to drive so Dave said he would let me have a drive of his car, it was in his garden don't worry. but i have decided that driving is slightly harder than it looks! it may take me a while before i pass so your roads are safe for a bit.lol
Just to add to that i spent another half hour driving again and maybe its not so hard as long as you do things systematically. check gears, turn on, clutch 1st hand break go! not as easy as one two three but close...

identity

Today I saw a advert encouraging young people to make a film about their identity, it got me thinking can we really sum up our identity. 4 photos to say who you are from your existing iphoto library.what are yours?

Exams, stress and opportunities.

Why is it that went you don’t have time to think you brain wont turn off? Recently I have been stressing about my exams and work and everything else, ask Dave he will tell you.
(It’s a bit of a mumble but I cant be bothered to make it make sense (the post that is) so you can make what you want form it).


My exams start on Monday with an ICT one 15 flipping hours! As its been pointed out to me I cant stay quiet for 15 minutes, 15 hours is a joke! Never mind there is a first for everything. Because of these exams the silliest little things are stressing me out like work. I have had a week off this week and now don’t want to go back to be honest I really dislike it there, so I applied for a new job which I don’t think I will get because of my age but what is the harm in trying the worst thing that can happen is that I stay at Sainsbury’s for a bit longer. So I have had that to think about but I have been mainly thinking about university and where I’m taking my self, I would love to do a theology degree but I cant quite bring my self to do that because I am not sure it would take me anywhere so I’m going to take youth work and theology or a degree in youth ministry. But before this I’m going to take a year out shadowing someone hopefully I have no idea where or who with but I think its will be a great experience (if I can leave the country stupid braces).
With life now I feel as if I’m dangling, I have stopped climbing my mountain, I want to get back on but have so many things to do it’s a bit crazy, every time I start to climb I fall off only a little higher than I started. It’s a bit frustrating and I don’t feel I’m getting anywhere im not getting any better or any further I haven’t changed even though I have put effort into improving. I have so many opportunities that could be grabbed and many that don’t arise for example no college in the local area does theology or RS as a course, would love to do it but cant. Do you ever feel like you have been trying but aren’t a help and you just hindering people or annoying them.
I suppose if I cant see positive effects on the surface I don’t think they are going very well for example Slam’s worship because I cant see the young people engaging it doesn’t seem to be effective, maybe its harder to get people out of this view that music is the only way, maybe I was being naive and that changing the way a small group of 30 think will somehow effect and change the way other people think and it boils down to my silly little view that all worship in a group environment (as it is a lifestyle choice) shouldn’t be singing, singing is great but why is it the only way and why don’t people see that its not, sometimes it feels a bit like I am the only one who thinks this. Ah someone switch my mind off and stop me thinking… I think worship is my little niggley bit that bugs me don’t get me wrong singing is great just not all the time, it may be because I’m a doing person I like to fiddle, give me a bit of blue tack and a song to sing I would be content do it for hours but I need that extra activity to keep me engaged I have a short attention span…(grr my blog posts again going on about worship and moaning! I’ll stop.)
Well any way exams stress and opportunities will a bit of added moan on the side…

Out with Jim-Bob!

oh i love it!im such a kid, i have to do all the actions and everything! i had a great time as always but this time me and Dave came up with GIG GAG BINGO! because Jim makes so many predictable jokes we decided on Saturday when we go next we are going to put it in a bingo board and play throughout the gig the winner with a full house has to shout at the top of their lungs "YES LORD!" its going to be so great.
On other news my exams start sometime next week joy of joys and i have the week off work woo, which means i can leave all those problems alone for a week, i really need a new job, to finally get rid of my boss and the purvey security guard.till next time!

Rest of my last post

[post was too long for my phone] to feeling ill.oh im getting glasses which i dont like either and my boss just yelled at me for clocking out literally 1min early and being shot timed 30mins for it as well as telling me my selfish.i cant see the good in it its either just been two really bad days or i need to open my eyes and look at whats happening around me.my annoyances seen so small when looking at the things other people face but it feels so negative.monday attitude problem tuesday selfish.wednesday?

Why is it when your having one of those weeks its so hard to see the positive side of it. I know that most of the things to happen in the last few days are tiny but boy can they make you feel low.
It started by my ict coursework becoming coding for some reason and losing that then to my ict teacher saying i have an attitude problem which i cant see but am trying to improve anyway.then to missing work and getting a cool from my store manager because i had got my weeks confused think i was on holiday...

Back to what i call "life"

One week later i have finally got back to normal life after the week that was Spring Harvest. it was a great week i finally came made friends with the microphone i have learnt not to be too bossy and that i need to learn how to tell someone to shut up ! it was a great 5days and i would continue doing it for another week if i had my own bed and my own food i really enjoyed it and woo our offering came to over £1500! yay :D other than SH i have spent a week doin my own hing while dave was away and now that it is friday i have realised that i whould have been doing a report this week so instead of the end of my holiday being nice and relaxing getting ready for college i will be writing reports how fun! oh and at some point i need to train for race for life or i will die doing around the track!

ps for Dave i am happy with my life no matter what the name implies! Thank you!x

Blank Canvas

Blank canvas, my dad always used to tell me that a blank canvas killed a painter, the first thing you do when you are painting it to cover the white. For some reason I was thinking about this morning, it might have been while I was colouring in a sheet of paper but I don’t know. It made me think do we view people as a blank canvas that can be highly influenced by our actions by the colour we paint them, the picture that their life will develop into. Are our lives a blank canvas? Or and we painted on already? I think everyone is born with a colour on them everyone has a different shade, and that it is our lives, the way we act and the people that we meet that influences our painting, we a constantly being repainted.

Thinking...

everyone thinks in different ways and everyone has ideas that are completely different to other peoples, but it sometimes feels like everyone follows suit, everyone has the same ideas and no other fresh ever happens. we get stuck in our ways it may be the way we act or live but we get stuck. why is it that no one ever has the balls to say what they really think? maybe deep down they want to change something, someone. But they cant, because we live in a world full of people who want to be liked, not stick out, be like anyone else, be included so therefore saying something radical that may rock the boat make you rethink doesn't happen. we get stuck in our ways. We should be moving constantly changing constantly, why dot we like change? OK it different but maybe it better than something predictable there is story of the vicar who wanted to move a piano but the congregation didn't want it to be moved, they didn't like change. so every week for 3 years he moved it an inch every Sunday until he had it where he wanted it. we are always changing even if we dot realise it. i want to be someone that changes things, maybe make someone look at something differently, maybe see the world I do for a change. It always feels that IM the only one thinking something. maybe that a problem with me but IM not changing it as far as IM aware IM going to use it to my advantage.

PG tips and Monkey

Sainsbury's is good for one thing.
You get a free monkey !have a look you can also buy them look! enjoy!

Jesus!

This post is for Tasha, she keeps saying Jesus so we now have this thing going on that every time she says it i shout at her "Christ was the son of God and he loves you"let this be a warning to you all i will actually do it i have done it in the middle of new look and trust me the odd looks dont bother me!
on another note my dad got me some new shoes out of the blue and my mum says i look like some one out of the Bay City Rollers i dont even know who they are? can someone tell me were they any good and is it a good thing to have shoes like them?
oh one more thing NEVER work for Sainsbury's!

Time

Time is such a burden in our lives we always have to stick to deadlines, some are good and some just make me stressed (like six pieces of coursework due in on one day). I feel that there are too many deadlines in my life not giving me the time to do things that I really enjoy, I want to take some more big steps in my life but don’t have the time, it really annoys me maybe I need to find some extra time from somewhere....
I like to be challenged (I know I moan about it but I do) I like to be pushed out of my comfort zone but I cant do that when I have a million and one other things to think about. This is why I’m looking forward to my year out, I’m still debating weather or not to go in the summer but the year out is definitely going to happen. Muskoka Woods has really been on my mind, 9 weeks is a long time and it would mean missing so much if I went, my AS results potentially packing in my job (not that I like it that much anyway) not being able to learn to drive for an extra two months no grapevine it's all about summing up what I’m going to do but in the end it all comes down to time I would have to do coursework out there as I will be missing three weeks of college, will I have time to do that my job and catch up on all the work I’m missing? I really don’t know...
Oh and another time comment stupid work don’t let you have the time off you were agreed grrr!

Attitudes

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company ... a church ... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude ... I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me, and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you ... we are in charge of our Attitudes."
Attitude: Charles Swindoll

friends...

isnt it strange how we view life? the way we treat our friends the way they treat us, its amazing that everyone has an ability connect with someone within a few seconds of meeting some one, the way we interact with them. but why does society define what is right between friends? is it strange for a girl to have many guy friends but yet have no attraction to them. why is it that some people cant define what is too far an a friendship, some people have an inability to know what is right and wrong until then end up getting hurt. one of my friends recently has become too close, where if this was i guy i wouldn’t mind i could deal with that and at least there are people to gain advice from but i have an obsessive girl telling me she loves me and kissing me and just generally being strange with me, i have finally realised after 16years of my life and talking to many useless people that at the end of the day it’s a lot easier to be straight with someone (no pun intended) and be your self and let them get over it rather than making it in to a big deal. i suppose in the last few weeks i grew up im getting there slowly

Best of 2006

2006 was a tuff year but iv come out better the other side.
in 2006...
...me an Dave went to our first wedding as a couple teehee thanks Sam and Ben!

...i got my GCSE results

...i realised that no matter how shitty things get there is ALWAYS someone there for you and there is no point being a big strong man/woman about it and bottling it up

...my most life changing experience was grapevine it really opened my eyes

...me and Dave reached a year being together :D

...i went to my first conference (is that sad its in here???)

...my fave film was Over the Hedge

...my fave book was Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell it made me think

...fave CD was Snow Patrol Eyes Open

...fave website was myspace

That was 2006 but that doesn’t matter because 2007 is going to be bigger and better and we can all forget about 2006 because it is not history we cant relive it so wipe it out your pretty little head! :D